Stress is often thought of as a bad thing, but actually certain levels of stress and anxiety are essential for our children to grow and develop into healthy young adults. When our bodies feel anxious or stressed it is a God given trigger to our brains that a challenging situation is ahead, and our bodies physiologically gear up to respond to that challenge.
Normal levels of stress:
- help students prioritize and focus their time
- provide opportunity to take healthy daily risks
- alert students about a potentially dangerous situation
- motivate our children to get out of bed in order to make it to school on time
….all of which are good things!
Sometimes stressors in life become so big that stress turns into distress.
Symptoms of negative stress in teenagers may include:
- chronic agitation and irritability
- avoiding school or extracurricular activities
- sleep disturbances
- binging on electronics
- poor grades and study habits
- disorganization
- defensiveness
(Sounds like a normal teenager right?!) Most teenagers show these characteristics in normal levels, but when you notice an increase of any of these, be aware that your student may be overwhelmed)
Teenage girls often show distress by setting unrealistic and perfectionist expectations of themselves.
Teenage boys often show distress by avoiding undesirable activities such as homework and are very disorganized.
How can parents help their student manage stress?
- Allow them to face the natural challenges of the day with some level of independence.
- Make them set an alarm to wake themselves up each school day.
- Limit the amount of time you communicate with them via cell phone when they are at school.
- Help them plan out their weekly schedule (do not do it for them!)
- Require they have a set time each evening to sit and study quietly.
As parents, we want to allow our children to face normal daily stressors so they develop into well adjusted young adults. Feel free to help them navigate these stressors and let the natural consequence of stress teach them that they can handle it!
If you observe your child showing signs of distress, feel free to contact your child’s school counselor or one of our STAR Team members. We are here to support and partner with you.